My Recent Spiritual Attack

💬 Quote From My About Page by Broken Halo

Steve, what an amazing testimony you have! I am so thankful that when the world took sight from you God gave you a new vision and perspective. What a blessing that God graced your life with a love in Sarah when your life was at its darkest…I pray that God continues to bless you both…. ~*~

My Thoughts 💭

After receiving this lovely comment on my About page from Broken Halo, it convicted me to write about the recent spiritual attack I have been battling with.

A couple of people have said to me that if I just had more faith or if I believed just a little more then God would heal my Sight!

The God I love and believe in is awesome and bigger than I can imagine, so I know he can heal anyone or anything if it is his will.

In the amazing book “Where is God when it hurts” by Phillip Yancey, I’ve read how destructive and poisonous peoples comments can be, it makes me wonder what they think about people like the truly inspiring and faith filled follower Joni Eareckson Tada?

Would they say f she just had more faith would she not be disabled and her amazing ministry Joni and Friends that helps transform lives and bring so many into the kingdom of God not even exist??

Can anyone please help me clarify?

All I know is, if God didn’t arrest me from my old life where I spent every day abusing my eyes with all kinds of wrong things,then I would never have had a relationship with him, never have found such a loving wife, never have this blog to hopefully inspire people, I would be another wasted lost soul.

The eyes of my heart are truly open and I’ve never seen so clearly since I’ve been blind, and if God thinks our relationship could be improved by having the sight that veiled me for so long, i’m sure he would give it me.

I know the apostle Paul talked about the thorn he lived with that God would not take away as it was for his own benifit that he didn’t receive healing.

 I would love to hear your opinions on this!

About Steve

✞Follower of Christ, Husband, Guitarist, Drummer, Photographer, Health & Fitness advocate....Oh and i'm also Blind too! 😀

42 Responses to “My Recent Spiritual Attack”

  1. I’m not gonna lie – I DETEST the comment “well if you had more faith”. Nothing quite gets smaller than a mustard seed, does it? I do believe comments like diminish faith rather than build it up

    • Totally agree with you, yes comments like that destroy and knock down.
      Thanks so much for stopping by and spending time to have a look around! Its great to see you here, and i look forwards to chatting again and spending more time on your blog!
      God bless. 🙂

  2. Steve, Thank you for sharing this. I needed to hear this today! It is a terrible misconception people have that disability, pain or hardship is God’s punishment. I believe it is in fact the opposite. I have found in my own life that the more I seek to honor God, I seem to have more pain and hardship. Not because of anything I’ve done wrong, but because of all that is right. God wants to use our testimony of how great He really is…and what kind of testimony would we have if we never had anything to overcome? What a vivid reminder to me and others how we need to watch our words.

    • Thanks for stopping by and checking out my blog and leaving this great inspiring comment!
      I’m so blessed to have love, encouragement and guidance from all of the amazing bloggers like yourself!
      God bless you. 🙂

  3. You make me humble… GOD bless

  4. Steve, what a courageous story. Thank you for sharing this as it is a reminder that some of us do have a thorn in the flesh to keep us humble in God. I also have a thorn in the flesh that is tormenting me, especially when I am growing stronger in the Lord and I am doing His will. Yesterday I was tortured tremendously and today it is better. You are encouragment to all of us who struggle with these things. My torture is too private to discuss as it is very personal to explain.

  5. Steve,

    Thanks for the “like” to “depressionsgift.com”. It will never cease to amaze me that some Christians can be so uneducated.They must not read their Bible or they would know how ignorant and unloving they sound.

    Yes, we are to pray in faith believing but when the answer isn’t what we want, we don’t lose faith. We just keep on praying. How arrogant of us to think we are healed because we are such “prayer warriors”. I pray a lot. I pray for healing for others a lot. I pray with as much faith as I can muster. Some are healed, some aren’t and I would be the last person to judge their Christianity based on their healing or the lack of it.

    Does it ever occur to these same people that using their logic, no one would ever die of anything because they would always be healed, even from old age? Yet, we know that physical death is guaranteed each of us. When I hear people like that, I must admit there is a not-so-nice part of me that says, “just wait, your time of suffering from is coming.” Let’s face it, no one leaves this earth without going through something. I wonder how they’ll fare when the shoe is on the other foot?

    I, too, have claimed healing from an illness, depression, but I’m careful not to paint too broad of a stroke that causes those who still deal with it to feel spiritually inadequate. I also am smart enough to know that I don’t understand why some are healed and others aren’t. Apparently, these paragons of virtue, do. What I do know though is that God, not them, is the one who chooses who to heal and who not to, and the reasons why.

    For others to place such a burden on you and assume to know your level of faith is outrageous. Oh, but for the grace of God, go they.

  6. Hi Steve,
    First thanks for visiting and following my blog. And second, I saw this post on my phone, and then actually got out of bed to go to the computer to write this because I was so excited about it!!
    My whole life there was one physical illness that I was afraid of more than anything else. For my own particular reasons, that was Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. When I was 19, I got the illness. I’ve had it now for 8 years. I absolutely don’t think that we have a mean God, who deliberately struck me down with what I feared most, but I do absolutely believe that He allowed it to come into my life.
    I too was often discouraged by friends who would tell me I needed more faith for healing etc, and I too have been amazingly encouraged by Joni’s story.
    Over the last 8 years I have become closer to God, and learnt far more than I ever could have without my illness, and God has done some amazing things in my life.
    One of the most amazing is this: He has shown me that there is a far greater miracle than healing! I’ve been challenged by that story of Jesus healing the lame man. He said “which is easier, to say ‘your sins are forgiven,’ or to say ‘get up and walk.'” This really struck me, because it made me put my life in perspective. Healing is the SMALL miracle. The greater miracle is Jesus’ ability to change our hearts (taking us from enmity with Him to redemption). Over the last 8 years He has done that for me. I no longer have the fear of suffering I once had; i desire HIs will more than my own now; I have a greater hope in heaven; and I have (unbelievably) learned to see my suffering as a gift because of the refining work it does in my life. I am convinced that all this is worth it for the ‘joy that is set before me.’ And as I press on towards that goal, I am convinced that God gives only good gifts. That when I stand before Him in glory, I will be able to praise Him, in a far more complete way, for all things that He brought into my life, because I will fully understand how he has worked ‘ALL things together for my good.’
    I hate being sick all the time. I would hate being blind even more. It is right of us to hate those things that are results of the sinful world we live in, but in the midst there is such profound joy!!! Joy because we are in the center of God’s will, and I truly believe that all this takes greater faith, and is a greater gift, in many ways, than healing.
    Bless you, and praying for you as you struggle with something far greater than what I’ve ever had to deal with. Hope that you can find some encouragement in what I’ve said. It is not an easy road… but I’ve come to believe that it wasn’t meant to be.

    • Wow, this is amazing! Thanks so much for sharing.
      I am truly encouraged by your story and loving words.
      I’m so blessed to be able to share this journey with you. God bless you. 🙂

  7. When I had M.E I encountered the following:
    If I had acceptance of my condition, I was cursing myself by declaring it over me; If I went up for every bit of prayer, I was trying too hard; If I didn’t, I didn’t have enough faith!
    You can never win, what does win though, is never getting offended with God and thanking Him FOR the particular thing it is you’re dealing with, knowing, believing and trusting that God is ultimately sovereign in our lives as believers and He is using it for good.
    The enemy is never interested in our health, our finances or our families (common targets for his weapons), he’s only interested in our faith! That’s the REAL treasure he’s after. Once I got that truth in my spirit, I kinda looked at my adversary differently, took the fear away and made me see that I walk through this earth with a pot of gold!

    In my experience of having an ‘incurable’ condition I pass on the following that helped me:
    Accept your circumstances whilst ALWAYS believing for a miracle; Learn to be content and offer the sacrifice of thanksgiving in every circumstance. (Learn I said, not be…it’s a skill!) Pray boldly, I always asked for complete and total restoration; Be at peace between you and God and then…graciously ignore everyone when they say your this, that and the other and haven’t got this. that and the other! Smile, extend grace and be at peace! Hahaha

    God Bless Steve 🙂

  8. Steve, if you hadn’t lost your sight, you might never have come to the Lord, like you said in your post. Who knows why God chose to use that to bring you to Him? And like so many here have said, you truly see more than seeing people. You have lost one of your senses so you do not take things for granted like so many do. You rely truly on faith in our living God and not on what you can see; yet you see with the eyes of your heart, like you said. That is why I love your photographs so much because they truly are the photos of a sighted person, not necessarily a seeing person. You see the beauty, the focus in the pictures even though you can’t see in the natural and you have even said yourself, you don’t know how the pictures turn out the way they do. I have learned that I cannot change God or twist His arm to do what I want despite what people say. I can declare, yell, shout all I want in faith the things I want to happen, but if it’s not in God’s will, it won’t happen. And what is good to God is not necessarily what we think is good. But then He measures things differently than we do, doesn’t He? His ways are higher, His thoughts are higher than ours. And always better. Always good. Not by our measures or standards. Keep believing in Him for good things for your life and your loved ones. Who knows if He will heal your sight one day or not? Whatever it is, He always knows what is best for you for He knows the hearts of men. Your blog has been and is an inspiration. Thank you for obeying the Lord and writing it.

    • Wow, thanks so much for spending the time to leave this comforting comment. I completely agree with you and thank God daily for loving me enough to save me. So i want to show him thanks and try and tell as many people as i can about his amazing grace, not sit here complaining because i have suffered but use that suffering to hopefully connect and inspire people.
      Thanks again for being a loving sister in Christ! 🙂

  9. Cool article, interesting, let me put a link on my website to it.

  10. First off, I usually answer things incorrectly, so forgive me if this isn’t the right answer, lol! But this is my opinion.

    When I read this I automatically thought about Matthew 4:1-10. I had to look it up to make sure they were the right verses, but the one verse I was looking for were verses 5-7,
    “Then the devil took him to the holy city and had him stand on the highest point of the temple. “If you are the Son of God,” he said, “throw yourself down. For it is written:

    “‘He will command his angels concerning you,
    and they will lift you up in their hands,
    so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.’[c]”
    7 Jesus answered him, “It is also written: ‘Do not put the Lord your God to the test.’”

    I know that people who have questioned me about God have given me these little questions, and I just took it as “testing God”, what’s the point in testing Him when we are suppose to have faith in Him? I can’t imagine how many moments in your life are probably frustrating, but God does everything for a reason. He wanted you to figure out that you see better now that you can’t see as clearly. That you see Him better now. I think you are blessed with that realization, not many would see it that way. You have a testimony that so many people need to hear! God speaks to you so well, nothing needs to be fixed in my opinion 🙂

    • Awww thanks Amanda! Yeah life can sometimes get frustrating, but on the plus side i am also growing in patience! 🙂
      I have such a peace in my heart now that my identity is in Christ, and i could not connect with people on so many levels if i didn’t have the struggles that i face day to day. When a blind person talks with me and realises that i am blind too they instantly relax and know that there is someone that understands, then we can really connect and inspire one another. It’s amazing to be able to connect with people like this as i couldn’t get through on that level if i didn’t have sight problems. I give all the glory to God! 😀
      Thanks so much for taking the time to read and share your thoughts with me, its always such a pleasure to see you here!. God bless.

  11. Steve, the Lord uses people in different ways. You are a light to so many because you are inspiring. You embrace life and are grateful for your blessings verses feeling sorry for yourself and giving up. You are right where God wants you to be and the best is yet to come, my friend.

    • Wow, i’m totally speechless! The love, friendship and fellowship i receive on here is simply amazing and overwhelming! 🙂 God bless you.

  12. Steve, you spoke well. God is able to do anything, but how it blesses me to hear you give God glory even though He hasn’t chosen to physically heal you. How you are grateful that He opened your eyes spiritually. Your honest sharing of how, either way, you still trust Him – has blessed me so much! Thanks.

  13. Dear Steve,

    First off, thank you so much for an inspiring post. Every individual has their own cross to bear and in truth each burden is a gift from God in disguise. Every challenge we face is a chance for us to grow stronger and to fall even more deeply in love with our God. Faith is not about quantity, but quality. It is a journey. It is a battle. It is a choice. Faith is simply saying, “God was willingly crucified so that my sins may be forgiven. I know that I am not perfect, I know that I will fall, but I choose to never stop trying. I will always actively seek Him and fight to love Him each and every day.” God loves us, that is enough. It is our turn to fight for our King. Thank you for sharing your story Steve, and thank you for reminding us what faith truly is.

    – Daddy’s Little Brat

  14. Steve as I read your post, my mind ran on the man who was blind from birth in John 9. The disciples automatically assumed that his affliction was a result of his sin or his parents’ sin, but Jesus said neither, but that it happened so that the works of God might be displayed/manifest in him.

    Since the purpose of the man’s affliction was that the works of God might be displayed/manifest in him by Jesus at that particular point in time, no matter how much faith that man may have had for his healing prior to that point and no matter how many people may have prayed for him to be healed prior to that point, no healing would have occurred because his healing was tied into sovereign purposes of God that went beyond his personal situation and that were hidden until revealed to the disciples by Jesus.

    When we do not know God’s specific purpose in a situation, we must be careful not to conclude that a lack of faith or some specific sin on behalf of the afflicted is the reason why a person has yet to be healed or delivered from their circumstances because that is not necessarily so. Job was a righteous man and look at what he had to walk through until God turned his situation and Paul was told that God’s grace was sufficient for him to bear his affliction and it was not going to be removed. I went through a period of sickness that lasted almost three years and had my doctors confused, and even though I had faith from day one that God could instantaneously heal me, He in His sovereign wisdom chose a different way for His purposes….and yes, I had my “Job’s friends” too…..:)……but thank God for His Word and the witness of His Spirit in my spirit.

    Anyway Steve, like my sister above said, it’s not always about having enough faith. God is God. He is in control. He is sovereign and has His own purposes and plans and even though we are not always privy to them, we can rest assured that once we love Him and are the called according to His purpose, He is working all things together for our good.

    Thank you for being the light, encouragement and witness that you are…….it is a great inspiration…….keep the faith and rest in His love for you……..Kim

    • Kim, thanks so much for this teaching and for sharing some of your experiences with Gods will. Yeah its so important for us not to judge other people as we will never know how God is working in and through their life.
      Thanks for being an inspiration to me. 😀

  15. Excuse my French Steve but what you have been told is a bunch of crock. I am so tired of hearing this kind of garbage from the name-it-claim-it unGospel. That’s right. It is not the Gospel. It is from the pit of hell and smells like smoke. Nowhere does it say we are guaranteed healing or wealth or anything else here on earth. That’s why our best life isn’t now. What we are promised is God’s faithfulness through all we go through. THAT is what we are promised! Don’t give that garbage another thought. That’s my .02 worth.

    • Wow, thanks for sharing and getting straight to the point! We have to be so careful when sharing the good news because people can easily get it wrong if not said with spiritual guidance. Thanks for commenting and helping me through this. God bless.

  16. Steve, I think you’ve got a sound, biblical perspective on it. The ladies above have added very good points.

    This big, fallen planet has a whole lot of things wrong with it, doesn’t it? And it is God’s goodness that allows for all the brokenness to bring us back into relationship with him for eternity. Still, in our flesh, the hurts and brokenness sometimes sting and make us beg the question “Why?” in moments when we want something different here and now, not in the hereafter. It can be hard to fully trust his will to be good, perfect, and pleasing (Romans 12:2). *sigh*

    Thankfully, he understands us, and his grace covers these things.

    • Yeah it sure is a broken world and i thank God daily for his grace and that he loved me enough to save me and want a relationship with me. Thanks so much for the comment andd for always being here to encourage me. 😀

  17. Many times I have seen the LORD heal someone but not in the way that they expected. Instead of the physical healing they desired, they received spiritual healing instead. The LORD allows us to go through the valleys to increase our faith. I agree, Paul never received the healing he wanted, but the LORD was so much more to Him because when Paul was weak, then the LORD was strong. Our healing has much less to do with our prayer & amount of faith, for the LORD to heal us; and much more to do with how He wants to use us in this life and what it takes to accomplish that. Our witness of living through the trial/disability is much more effective for the kingdom sometimes. Your witness and faith inspire me.

    • Wow, thanks for the inspiration. I wouldn’t change my life and my relationship with God for anything, and i certainly don’t look back to when i was fully sighted as i still had the eternal God shaped hole in my empty life! Thanks for following and commenting, it means so much to have the true teaching, love and encouragement from the sisters in Christ on here. 😀

  18. Steve, you are so right God is so capable and able to heal if it is in his will. Some sisters in Christ and I have been discussing at church this week the “theology” of those who believe if you have hurts, illness or pain it must mean you don’t believe enough or you’re doing something wrong. Just look at the life of Job and we know this is not true. We were discussing how miraculous healings can take place, but it’s not always a matter of having “enough faith.” God is God. He is in control! Thank you for this awesome message today.

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