iChristian

So, this amazing world we all desire
The pure life to which we all aspire
What’s the issue; why aren’t we moving higher
Seems like the fat lady has left the choir

This is the question: why do we feel ashamed
Of the build blocks that are acclaimed
Components of this world we’ve named
The dream-world that our minds have framed

We want honesty and we chase easy money
We want fidelity and we love indecency
We want stability and we love to disagree
We want equality and we seek the most for me

Those are the traits of the world we pine for
Where trust is the currency used to pay for
All we need, and life is worth living for
So why don’t we build this world we’d die for

Why do our bodies move against our minds
Why do our actions contravene our dreams design
Why is…

Surely, all we are seeking is surety
In a future laid out with some clarity
A place where we all will act morally
Where evil is no more than history

This is not a case of insanity
But a people of grave insecurity
Somehow the masses act horribly
The individual lost in the majority

Has goodness become an obscurity
With billions relying on charity
We still see such acts of barbarity
And every country shares in this tyranny

So if you are after sincerity
And a world that is structured with honesty
There is one question that leads to maturity
Have YOU fallen in love with PURITY

Well, this is just typical
Take a fundamental part of life
And mutate it into something horrible

Need says:

Of course, I’m normal
There’s nothing wrong with me
I’m merely part of the circle of this life
And thanks to all the feelings
Plus the emotional triggers and responses
That are a part every one of you
I can help you explore and enjoy
Come and get me
I’ll always give you something to do
But take care that you don’t focus on me
Rather than on the other people
That you share me with
Or it could get very nasty….

Greed says:

Why did you have to unleash me onto the world
And you thought mutants only lived in SyFy movies
All you have to do is satisfy your real needs
And life is beautiful; A trillion flavours
So much that you can do
And more importantly; share
You…

Is there even any difference between us
Well, put it this way
Pain certainly gives birth to suffering
But is really only a surrogate mother
It’s your baby

Pain says:

You think you don’t like me; I understand
But without me you would be
In all kinds of trouble; I speak truth
And that truth reveals very important facts
So I’m fulfilling my vocation
It’s you that is letting the side down
I say: ‘don’t do that’
Or: ‘that is not a good idea’
You say: ‘Shut up – leave us alone’
And then, further down the line
You look at me and my child
The child you fathered
And hate us – thanks

Suffering says:

I think I should mention
That many people leave me stronger
Than they were when we met
But to be fair, I don’t like my position
It’s true, I am one of Pain’s children
The…

We are definitely a team
You can’t make one of us work
Without the other – so be careful
Truth alone does not make you smart

Truth says:

I certainly am what it says on the tin
And I have no problem
Hitting you where it hurts
It’s correct: Until you get hold of me
You will not be set free
Because I always show you what’s what
But I can be like fire
So don’t dispense me unless you have to
And how do you know that
Well, my friend can help you

Wisdom says:

Like a good wine – I mature with age
And without me you will get into trouble
There are impostors, pretending to be me
But you can spot them a mile off
Always telling you just want you want to hear
I am much more subtle – not always liked
I am very serious…

Although we walk hand-in-hand
We are not the same thing
Be very careful how you treat us

Freewill says:

I do not care much about anything
I am just here to obey you
I will do whatever you say
And if you don’t speak carefully
Then I will happily destroy your freedom
To myself I seem simple
But you are always struggling
Is there a man among you who can control me

Freedom says:

No-one can understand me
I’m here one minute and gone the next
One false move from freewill
And you won’t see me for a long time
This is sure: you only think about me when I disappear
And you only feel me when you have been held captive
You may not even know what I am
Until it is too late – so tread carefully

Do we cry in vain
Because tears only fall on the lost
Will it feel the same
How will we count the cost

In the next age
When there will be no crying
No more rage
We will have seen the death of dying

When we are there
Will there be people missing
Cause now we share
A fear of weeping

Those tears will not go
Where we will be
They will not flow
On our side of eternity

But now don’t shy away
From shedding tears
Please cry all day
For those who need your prayers

Cry for the lost
Use tears while you have them
Once the line is crossed
You can’t go back again

With all of us now so far lost in our mess
Who can turn things around for us

Who can show us where we have gone wrong
And not get caught up with us in everything we’ve done

Who can free us from the motives that bind us
And the needs that mean we our always out for ourselves

Who can overcome this vindictive world that we’ve made
And create a new Spirit that can be used to cure us all

What would his qualifications be; What CV would do
Let me think just what would be required

He must be innocent; Not just another hypocrite
He must speak the truth; Not just another liar

He must be able to stand the test of time
He must be proved right in all He does

He must not be working for Himself; Not with selfish motives
He must never give in…

Life is not the fact that we live and breath
But what we do with every breath we have

Life is not a biological condition that means your heart beats
It is something we build when our heart makes choices

When a life chooses error over good, then life itself gets damaged
Those errors cloud the world with terrible consequences

The results of those errors are not just individual evil acts
But binds that are placed around our collective hearts and minds

The more error we choose the more error we contain
And the less we remember about life and the less we like it

The more we choose death over life the more we damage the world
The more we live in this damaged world the more it blinds us

So, how do you change a world intent on destroying itself
How do you find out what that need…

It is only when we surrender that we are set free
And only while we continue to hold on to what we think we deserve that we give evil a place to live

Holding on = retribution
Letting go = forgiveness
Retribution = More destruction
Foregiveness = Rebuilding

We have all done wrong; and we have all been wronged
We can all seek retribution and continue destroying the world
Or we can all forgive and start building a new one

We can all hold on to the past and see where it gets us
Or we can all let go of the past and take hold of the future
It’s our choice

What can be nailed down
What can be held in place with metal spikes

A body; the body of an ancient Man
God; can you fix God in place with things that He created
A plan; an idea from the Mind that knows everything
A change; a ripple in time that confronts all evil
A future; the future of every human who has ever lived
Captivity; can you nail enslavement to a piece of wood
Lies; can you expose wickedness with a tree and some nails
Life; you can tie-up a person but you cannot tie-up Life

It was in nailing down a Life that life itself was set free
Perfection exposing a broken world to itself
Giving it the chance to see what it truly has become
Allowing it to be released; that is if it wants to be
Have you been set free; or have you not yet…

You put yourself
So high on that wall
The only way down
Was to have great fall

All the kings horses
And all the kings men
They ran away when they saw
The state you were in

But they’re not the ones
Who rule in this place
There is One greater
Who’s power is His grace

So if you’re there thinking
Your life fell apart
Just remember this, friend
That’s how it all starts

Just one King
No horses, no men
He’ll put you back
Together again

I took my ‘no way’
Put it on ebay
Sold it to yesterday
Now who can say
Not today
With nonsense at bay
I am no longer prey
To the one who would slay
I will walk in the Way

Went to tomorrow
So that I could borrow
Things that cast a shadow
On today and bring sorrow
Killed them with an arrow
Reduced them to zero
Now I can’t wallow
In all that was shallow
Enabled to follow a life with that Hero

So now it’s today
This is where I will stay
No longer to stray
Into things that are grey
Yesterday is where my mind will no longer play
And tomorrow will no more cause me to sway
Cause, come what may
I know I will lay
A good path – when I walk in the Excellent Way

Now – Let me give you some proper wisdom
Any ‘Life’ that you have managed to birth
You keep locked up – closely guarded by your fear of losing your wealth
And your need for control – because trust can’t live in this atmosphere
Your mutated feelings are binding you tightly

So, even if you want to change you can’t
You must first kill your love of money
Treat any desire for wealth with contempt
And trust the way of purity
Then you will start to hear me

As you are, millions die
Because your invisble cravings are so powerful
Your passion for money and false attention hold me prisoner
And don’t let me become what I was designed all along to be
I don’t want to remain out of reach

Listen to this: The only good reality is created between you
Relationships; experiences shared with clean and selfless motives

Listen to me
You humans are all the same
So good at blaming others
For your self-imposed deafness
You deliberately hold yourselves back

I am your friend
Do you know how loudly
I am shouting at you
You don’t hear because
You have filled you ears with money

I only keep this name
Because you continually fail to learn
I was born to change
Hindsight was designed to become wisdom
And that would change the world

Something went wrong
In the invisible realm that surrounds you
Progress got divided
Technology advances
While relationships remain out of control

Along the way your feelings have mutated
Taken control of you
Overpowered you and tied-up your logic
Now, you have little idea about life
I am completely ignored

You choose the easy life
Obeying every whim you have
Like a dog
Who will eat until he makes himself sick
That is the cowards…

Hindsight, I know that you are my good friend
But I don’t like the way you treat me
Always showing up late
With that ‘what did you do that for’ look
Splashed all over your face

I know I need you
I see – using you – that it is your job
To help teach me; teach everyone
About what is right and wrong
And how to change

I am just puzzled
About our relationship
You’re always there
But only after I needed you
Am I not treating you properly

Personally, I would like to keep you around
Perhaps you would stay
Or does my stubbornness keep you away
I know there’s something coming between us
Am I too hard-hearted to ask you to join me

So tell me – what do I need to do
To persuade you to stick around
Be onsite before I slip up
Then you…

Now I look back
I can easily see the deception
The feelings that were driving me have left
Gone to trouble someone else
Leaving me to see you for what you are

You’re handsome – that’s your disguise
Evil is written on your face in beauty
What kind of place is this
Beauty, who turned you into a liar?
Now you’ve corrupted the whole world

Well, at least I have changed
I see your reality
Through my Truth tinted spectacles
You put me through so much
I can’t believe I fell for you

Wisdom – where were you when I needed help
You left me; I was conned by my own heart
Tell me hindsight, where were you
Remaining cruelly in the future
I have some words for you

Some would consider me a newbie blogger but I can say it is something I am truly passionate about. Recently, while searching the internet for other diabetic bloggers, I discovered that there was a (fourth annual) Diabetes Blog Week. This link here (BitterSweetDiabetes) is where you can find the signups and all the information you need about participating. I’m very excited about this whole thing because 1) I love writing/blogging and 2) the topics are diabetes related..and I know all about that. 🙂 With that said I thought I would share in case some of you that blog about diabetes would also like to take part in this. It hasn’t started just yet, signups are today, and the week starts on the 13th.

I  am a huge advocate of anything that gets people talking/learning/sharing about this disease.

I am looking forward to reading new blogs. There…

Now my addiction has moved on from the prior; no longer in denial
Still with life altering habits but not faltering; no longer a buyer
Untangling the barbed wire, I found something higher
Before the consequences were dire but now – like Friar Tuck I’m in simple attire

I was preoccupied with an immediate gratifier
A modifier of truth – so I would perspire, call my supplier
Surrender my entire mind to a filthy liar
His words seemed to inspire me – but all they brought was fire

My feelings were twisted; used like pliers to remove my hearts desires
I got life-jacked by a beast; I was an occupier
Of a broken mind; my freedom was for hire
I had admired evil but now I know his style

On that road my wisdom got a flat tyre
Set to expire; I was a fake like Mrs Doubtfire
But I…

Who Am I?

I am a Christian – I thought I always was but my behaviour certainly didn’t say so. Maybe I am the opposite of one of the people John talks about in 1 John 2:19:

“They went out from us, but they did not really belong to us. For if they had belonged to us, they would have remained with us; but their going showed that none of them belonged to us.”

I was outside and refusing to come in for some reason, probably because I thought I was already there. Anyway, I am in now and I’m staying so I guess that means I always belonged!

I am also a husband and a father. I have a son from a previous relationship (the best son you could ever wish for) and a step-son (also amazing). I am a Street Pastor in the UK. I am a member…

How could I have got here; been tricked
Punched and kicked – now I feel sick
Why didn’t you tell me that you would take me
Twist me and make me do things that would break me

You said ‘this is good’; not that you would hold me
Grip me and mould me, secretly building the power to fold me
Now where do I go; is there still life to find
How do I think when you’ve stolen my mind

I’m lost – but the road was well marked
The signs they lied, saying ‘this is the way’ but now it’s so dark
There is no light here, just thickest emptiness
Is anything left for me; I couldn’t have less

I can’t leave you; a battered wife
I need you – but you’re killing my life
Somehow we’re connected; your evil in my soul
You have infected my spirit and…

Someone new
You meet – exchange some words
There’s nothing wrong
No sense of danger

You talk without thinking
Conversation flows
Before long friendship lives
Deep inside, unseen, unnoticed, things are connecting

Soon you are comfortable
Still unaware
You are happy, or
Still tidy; you hair has been brushed

Now a new thought has spoken
Things are ok, aren’t they?
This friend is to taking you
To places you’re not sure you like

It starts moving faster
Or has it been gradual all along
You’re so angry
But you don’t seem to care

You were only doing what you wanted
Isn’t liberty a good thing
You know you have been deceived
Has your freedom killed itself

Tell me
How much sex do you need
Until you have enough
So you can hear its voice saying
I won’t fulfil your life

Tell me
How much pain do you need
Until you have enough
So you can hear its voice saying
Something is wrong here

Tell me
How much money do you need
Until you have enough
So you can hear its voice saying
I don’t love you

Tell me
How much proof do you need
Until you have enough
So you can hear its voice saying
There must be another Way

If you thought yesterday was bad
Let me tell you some more
Although if you told me to listen
I probably wouldn’t

You see:

If someone tells me
Something’s wrong
I say
Don’t be stupid

When they tell me
Everything’s alright
I find something
That isn’t

If they tell me
I can’t have something
I’ll probably take it
Or get my own

But if they say
I can have it or even – I need it
That’s the last thing
I’m going to get

I doubt the truth
But I believe lies

The more I want to stop doing certain things
The more I seem to crave them

I remember to forget
The things I don’t want to do
But I forget to remember
What got me into that situation in the first place
So I carry on

I have compassion for bad people
That I don’t know
But if…

When I was young and foolish
I thought I was so clever
Now I’m wiser
I think I’m stupid

Calm people make me angry
Tiredness keeps me awake
I’m blinded by the things I see
I tell lies to be true to myself

Hunger makes me lose my appetite
Money makes me poor
Strength makes me weak
Problems make me positive

When I didn’t know God
How I needed Him
Now he’s with me
We hardly speak

I see impending doom – but I’m optimistic

Someone once told me I was full of contradiction
They’re probably right

A woman’s figure is absolutely powerful. It has the ability to completely intoxicate a man. It is one of the most beautiful sights that has been beheld on the face of the earth. It is sacred, and therefore should be treated as such.

In this section of Crystalina Evert’s “Pure Womanhood,” the main topic is modesty. She describes how dressing inappropriately will attract men who are interested in only one thing.

Women have power. By the way we dress, by the way we dance, and by the way we carry ourselves, we can invite a man to be a gentleman or a beast. So if a girl wants a guy to appreciate her intelligence and personality, she’s probably better off not distracting him with her pierced belly-button (pg 4-5).

Crystalina then poses an intriguing question: “What do I really want? Is it more exciting to be loved by one man…

They call you quarantined
You were so passive
Building on unstable ground
There was no motive
To turn your life around
You were a native
Of this land; destruction-bound
Just another captive
Until you ran aground
Now you’re really thinking

They call you realigned
You needed to be found
What could make you active
Pull you from the background
Something had to give
You had to hear the sound
That brings you to the truth
That’s where freedom’s found
In the life that you can live
Now you’re really thinking

They call you one of us
You think you’ve been so dumb
But that’s the story of mankind
The place we all come from
Good has always been maligned
To evil we’ve succumbed
The road to danger seems so kind
A golden coloured slum
That’s why we fall behind
Now you’re thinking

They call you many things
Your strength was undermined
Through solid water you have swum
And you have been refined
You wanted strength; Now you’ve got some
It’s time to break the bind
There’s a new tune that your life can strum
I’m sure that you will find
This is just one track on your album
You’re ready for the climb
Now you’re thinking

They call you hollow man
A mist of lies
Descended on your world
You bought a magic trick
Slight of hand
You didn’t see; he touched your mind
Still you – but just an image now
A barren tree
So many branches – beautiful
But each one dead
That’s your life
You’re still broken

They call you wasted youth
Lost everything
To a conman
Dressed in pure white
He sold you clouds
But they’ve never rained
All they contain
Are whispered lies
That fall onto your life
And so you listen
That what happens in this fallen world
You’re still broken

They call you black and white
You fell from grace
Colour stolen from your face
A lifeless figure took your place
A map of what you used to be
And could have been
Is standing in your life
That’s the story of this messed up land
Poison draws you…

They call you smithereens
You tripped over a lie
That day you fell apart
Your head was held so high
You thought you were so smart
Reaching to the sky
That was your weakest part
That’s why you didn’t cry
When he crushed your heart
Now you’re broken

They call you perfect mess
Falling for the bad guy
Deception is his art
Truth is never his reply
Covers words with golden dirt
Intention is for you to buy
A one way ticket to depart
Forever waiting just to die
Fish that took the blackest fly
Now you’re broken

They call you chequered flag
They say the end has come
Distracted by your damaged mind
Your perception was so numb
Your love for him had made you blind
Now look what you’ve become
All your days have been defined
By the rhythm of his drum
Your life is so confined
Now…

If I hear one more person say, “I can’t help it; it’s just the way I was raised” my next post will be from the confines of my holding cell at the county courthouse seeking bail money for “involuntary face smacking”!

I am well aware that your up-bringin’ plays a major role in what kind of adult you will become.  At some point though you have to stop riding on the coattails of mom and dad and be responsible for your own behavior.

So Mom was an alcoholic and was never there for you because she was face down in the pillow 18 hours a day.  Are you going to dive head first in the nearest bottle and drown your sorrows, setting the same,  shining example in front of your kids or are you going to learn from her mistakes?

Dad was a violent man who beat anything and everything…

I don’t want to go on and on, like the gossip in hair salon
Just want to empty my heart of this God given burden
To try and explain with words the invisible world that is hurting us like Genghis Kahn
This is real life; so much rubbish has gone on, we have a duty to try and understand what’s going on

Like it or not, we’ve got to face the fact something really is wrong
Who could imagine the things that go on, everyday while we all look on
Helpless, cause our hands are tied by money; or, if not, tell me what has come upon
Us – to make us behave like Don Juan- these words are strong but it’s been far too long

So what is this invisible breeze that’s blustering and flustering
Our minds, so we are covering the world with such a mix of evil…

Tell me brethren, are you bothering to listen to this pondering
Money, if you were wandering, doesn’t exist aside from our accounting
A great system but effectively amounting to a tool we use for squandering
Our futures and laundering dirty wealth so the unjust can go on prospering

What I’m trying to say is this currency isn’t real, but somehow we use it to steal
The futures of so many people; wheel and deal real lives cause they sell themselves for a single meal
Tell me; why don’t we hold the same zeal to undo this raw-deal
As the feeling we conceal for stainless-steel exhausts, high-heeled shoes and alloy wheels

The world is full of numbers on computers and paper telling you who is greater
Not a reflection of true labour or a list of good behaviour
Just a dictator of who gets what; a blessing calculator
Not love your…

Help me understand – Does it exist, this paper promised land
Just because you can hold it in your hand; slips through like sand
Green and white rectangles; the numbers say ‘five hundred grand’
But when I got there, at the checkpoint as planned – it was empty, unmanned

Still, it’s loved by everyone – you and me – replaced trust long ago as human currency
Money brings life – freedom to move for those with fiscal fluency
You work, get paid; that’s great – but how did we build a system where prosperity
Is strictly a minority, half the world is starving in the shadow of our obesity – that is heresy

We scrap purity for piracy, mutter incoherently about our needs for security
All the time our dependency on getting what we want is growing – line our nest, forget the rest – No parody
My dog needs…

Countryside
Trees and fields
Rivers running into oceans
Nature working; a world that is alive
So much life

Humans
Changing what they want to
Landscaping truth to meet desires
For better – or for worse
Definitely changing

Spirit world
Purest life in Freedom’s hand
Perfect in simplicity and trust
Relationships; sharing love together
So much life

People
Changing things because they can
Re-routing streams of living water
Paving over morals – Concreting over life
Now it’s different

Future
Twisted world; damaged hearts and minds
Destruction taking over
Cause we chase it – like it’s a good thing
That’s not life

Jesus Christ
He is different; He’s not normal
You love Him or you hate Him
But He’s the One – He’s the answer; if you want it
Bringing Life

Tiredness has become my unwanted friend
My stay-awake soul mate
He dulls my days – bores me
And keeps me up at night
How can he do that
It doesn’t make sense but I’m too far gone to think
He moves my thoughts and ideas
And hides them, just out of range
He took my ability to remember quite how long he’s been here
It feels like ages but I don’t care
He stole that as well – my frustration and my patience
I used to have an angel on one shoulder and a devil on the other
Now I’m not sure – I can’t be bothered to look
I just want him gone
But I can’t seem to stop feeding him
Is this a vicious circle
Who would think that tiredness was so active
So voracious – unrelenting and in my face
On my face; written in darkened lines

After we have lived this life that we continually choose to make, in spite of so much good advice

After all those choices, given in love – have been snatched by broken hands and thrown in Wisdom’s face – and Wisdom, being what She Is, turned them around and used them for our good

After pride and envy and greed and every other destructive thing have finally shown themselves for what they really are

After the last hiding place of every evil motive has been revealed by the acts of all the players in this game of life and death

After lies told have travelled far enough to reach the place from where they first were born

After we have journeyed through arid deserts and scorched our feet on the smoking shards of every broken promise

After we have paid the price – the debts of those we never knew…